1.If she's amazing, she wont be easy. If she's easy, she wont be amazing. If she's worth it, you won't give up. If you give up, ur not worthy.
2.Maybe you should eat makeup so you can be pretty on the inside
3.Joke of the day:
Officer : How high are you?
Me : No officer, its; Hi, how are you?
4.You're beautiful! :) until your Photoshop 30 day trial expires..
5.Dear 11 year olds on Facebook, it's complicated? Really? What did he do, steal your animal crackers?
6.There's a thin line between "I should do a status update about that" and "I should talk to a therapist about that"
7.Tip to reduce weight: Turn your head to the left and then turn it to the right. Repeat exercise when offered something to eat.
8."It is better to have an ENEMY who honestly says they hate you than to have a FRIEND who's putting you down SECRETLY."”
9.Sometimes you just need to distance yourself from people.If they care, they’ll notice. If they don’t, you know where you stand.
10.Why do people feel comfortable texting you things they would never have the guts to say to your face?
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Friday, December 2, 2011
Dirty Jokes
1.s*x is like math
add the bed
subtract the clothes
divide the legs
and pray to god you don't multiply.
2.Don't call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses.
3.Time goes by, life goes on, and all I can think of is why you’re gone.
4.I’m not a good lover, but at least I’m fast.
5.I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
6.Never be sad for what is over, just be glad that it was once yours.
7.To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful
8.God is closest to those with broken hearts.
9.The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else.
10.A teacher ask”wot part of the body goes to heaven first?”
A child replies”feet- coz every nite i c my mum with her
Feet in the air screamin GOD I’M COMIN!
add the bed
subtract the clothes
divide the legs
and pray to god you don't multiply.
2.Don't call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses.
3.Time goes by, life goes on, and all I can think of is why you’re gone.
4.I’m not a good lover, but at least I’m fast.
5.I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
6.Never be sad for what is over, just be glad that it was once yours.
7.To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful
8.God is closest to those with broken hearts.
9.The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else.
10.A teacher ask”wot part of the body goes to heaven first?”
A child replies”feet- coz every nite i c my mum with her
Feet in the air screamin GOD I’M COMIN!
Funny Quotes
1.There are two ways to rule a women and nobody knows them....
2.If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
3.Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
4.Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
5."I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants."
6.Gravity is not responsible for people falling in love.
7.Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
8.I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.
9.Biologically speaking, if something bites you, it is more likely to be female.
10.A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking, but a wise man tells her that her mouth is extremely beautiful when her lips are closed.
2.If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
3.Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
4.Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
5."I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants."
6.Gravity is not responsible for people falling in love.
7.Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
8.I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.
9.Biologically speaking, if something bites you, it is more likely to be female.
10.A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking, but a wise man tells her that her mouth is extremely beautiful when her lips are closed.
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